The 5 Must-Check Gauges to Keep Your Kids (and Yourself) Running Smoothly

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Parenting: the ultimate balancing act where you’re equal parts life coach, amateur detective, and short-order cook. Think of your kid as a car—one with ever-changing needs and a tendency to ignore the check engine light. To keep them (and your sanity) in working order, here are five “gauges” you’ll want to check regularly.

1. The Friend-o-Meter

Friends can be like an amplifier for your kid’s personality—turning the volume up in all the best (and sometimes worst) ways. As they grow, who they hang out with (and date!) can have a huge impact on their life.

Solution? Be the cool parent who hosts the hangouts. Stockpile pizza rolls, chips, and enough soda to run a small concession stand. And don’t be afraid to activate your inner 007—listen in casually (emphasis on casually) while folding laundry nearby. And yes, the occasional nanny cam joke is funny, but let’s keep it legal, folks.

2. The School-o-Scope

Ah, school. The one gauge that comes with built-in updates, thanks to report cards and digital portals that seem to notify you of everything (including what they had for lunch).

But here’s the secret weapon: teachers. Want the real scoop on how your kid’s doing? Build good rapport with their teachers by responding with gratitude, curiosity, and the occasional, “Wow, I could never handle 25 kids at once—what’s your secret?” Trust me, nothing keeps you in the loop like a happy teacher.

3. The Extra-curriculometer

Sports, music, chess club, underwater basket weaving—you name it, and there’s an activity for it. While extracurriculars can be amazing, it’s important to ask yourself two key questions:

1. Are we signing up for too much?

2. What’s the vibe of this activity?

For example, our kid loved cross-country because it was all about camaraderie and personal growth, not cutthroat competition. We stick to one activity at a time to keep the chaos manageable—for them and for us. No one wins if the family calendar looks like a NASA launch schedule.

4. The Feel-o-Tron 3000

Let’s face it, asking your kid “How are you feeling?” is sometimes met with a shrug and a grunt. But when they do open up, your job isn’t to fix their feelings (even though that’s the natural parent instinct). Instead, teach them it’s OK to feel—without letting those feelings run the show.

As Jennie Allen says, “Feelings aren’t meant to be fixed; they’re meant to be felt.” So next time they’re upset, try something radical: listen, nod, and say, “I hear you.” Then resist the urge to solve their problem unless they ask for help.

5. The Dad Dash

Finally, let’s not forget the most important gauge: you. Are you sleeping enough? Eating something other than leftover mac and cheese? Moving your body? Spending time with your partner? If your battery is running on fumes, your ability to parent will too.

Remember, you’re the engine that keeps the family running. Tune yourself up regularly, so you’re ready to tackle whatever your kid throws your way (even if it’s an eye roll or a questionable TikTok trend).

Sound Off

What’s the one gauge you’re always checking with your kids? Drop it in the comments—I’ll be the one sipping coffee and nodding in solidarity.